300 Plants And Insanity
Have you ever wondered what number of pelargoniums is that magic number that makes you go batty? Well, I think its 300. There is a series of phases that a pelargonium collector goes through...the novice newbie, the semi-obsessed, and the crazy collector. Each phase has unique characteristics. Some people never transition through all of the stages, but as you read on about these phases you will certainly think of some of our club members.
The Novice Newbie
This person likes pelargoniums but typically doesnt love pelargoniums...at least yet. They likely have less than 10 varieties in their collection. They may collect other plants, or be a friend or spouse of the 'really obsessed' pelargonium grower. They may ask a lot of questions on care requirements and are known to kill plants from time to time from trial and error. This can be a frustrating stage as everybody else has so many more plants and they seem to be in pelargonium trading 'alliances'. The heirarchy of plant clubs is very interesting, and at times the mysterious trading and rituals rivals that of the ancient spice trade route. If a novice newbie is lucky, they have a senior collector take them under their wing. Most of us have had a mentor in the past that has taught us many things and shared with us several treasures. If you are a novice newbie, the easiest way to climb to the next phase is by aquiring new varieties that nobody else has and using them to barter. Get some good books on pelargoniums, listen to others' tips, and arrive early to the sales tables...
The Semi-Obsessed
Once you hit this level you begin searching for new varieties regularly. You may shove aside others at a sales table and start dreaming about pelargoniums. Your collection has grown considerably...from 10 to perhaps 50 varieties. You have begun to sort your collection most likely and have mastered the science of taking cuttings and keeping 'backup'. In this stage people will also lose varieties from time to time, but these losses hurt! Your collection represent family members to you now, and you will be darned to let one go! At this stage you have some good alliances within the club and people respect your collection. You may exhibit your plants for shows or perhaps hoard your collection in great secrecy. Money is starting to fly out the window in this stage...greenhouses, grow lights, electrical bills, new plants, soil, pots, etc, etc, etc. You are becoming addicted and realize that you have a problem.
The Crazy Collector
In this phase you are sort of nuts. You have more than 50 plants, and perhaps more than 100. You pride yourself on knowing all the names and stories behind the plants. People look up in facination to your collection and wonder how you do it. You hunt plants using books, the internet, and are always first at the sales table. Heck, you likely bring plants to the sales table. Either extras to donate, or you have to generare revenue now to pay for your addiction. Your collection has gone from being beautiful displays in your garden to the entire garden. Pots are everywhere. Trays, shelves, propagation mats are everywhere. You have a grow op going on and wonder when the electricity bills will bankrupt you or the police will show up because of the pink glow being emitted from your basement windows. It becomes important to keep good records at this stage because its getting confusing. You are obsessed.
Insanity?
If you ever make it beyond the Crazy Collector stage you very well may go insane. For myself, the 300 mark was scary. Granted, several of these are yet to be named hybrids of mine, but I still count them (even if they are just a number right now). I strive to remember all the names and where I got each plant originally. I find it funny to scare people with this knowledge even though deep down I know many feel sorry for me at this point. At 300 plants you dont search much for the plants, they actually start coming to you. People start giving you plants at this stage because you are the backup repository of the club. If you can stay sane and organized you will be just fine. But some collectors go off the deep end and get overwhelmed at this level of obsession. Take my advice...even though you may have piles and piles of different plants, take some time to marvel in the simply beauty of a bloom or leaf. Recall a past memory of a friend that shared plants with you. Try to remember your original plants in your collection and most importantly, become a mentor to a New Newbie. Our great collections and passion will only transcend the gernerations if we bridge our plants and wisdom to the next in line.
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